Long story, but maybe instructive to sensitive souls: Some of you may know that last night I felt very unwell. All of a sudden, on a pretty good work day, I energetically felt like I had been run over by a truck or drank a bottle of tequila or just ran out of gas. I couldn't move, I was dizzy and sick and... So, I cancelled my beloved New Moon Drum Celebration. Felt awful all through the night, and sick enough to go to urgent care today with heart and head pain and so on...to no result except to suggest i find me a primary care doc or go to the emergency room...which felt all wrong. .
Came home, frustrated, mad, and still reeling. Put in a call to my Naturopathic Doc. Tried to find a primary doc to visit and then just let go...nothing was working. Lit a candle, tuned in, and got this; My gift of seeing auras has recently increased: A lot more content, which is good for my work, but not so good for my human as she adjusts to the extra load of stuff (including awful stuff) she sees. So I called a student of mine who knows a local smart physician who sees auras, and may I have his name and #? She said she'll come over just to be with me, and we had a chat, and I cried, and got insights about how I want to do my work with more joy, and get people out of their sorrowful states of being (why do you think I love Zumba so much? )
...and after awhile, I felt better. Made call to see the new doc in November. Naturopath called back to say she was putting together a healing tincture for me.
I felt better and better. Made some food, danced a little in my kitchen, then felt an urge to turn on the tv and watch the Ellen show and then saw IT: There was a shooting in Marysville High School, 2 dead, including the shooter, and 4 seriously injured. I know that there is a relationship to what I felt and this shooting: I often feel awful 12 to 24 hours before a violent event.
Yesterday, we had solar flares and an eclipse: a powerful cocktail that often sees unexpected violence from normally "nice" people. So....now what? Next time I feel this badly, I am going to get centered, like I tell people to do, and send out prayers...just send them out to wherever they need to go. I often feel physically better after praying; no matter the awfulness of the event I am praying in advance of. I don't know why I feel as I do. I only know that, rather than viewing these symptoms as a way for the Universe to torture me, I can see them as a sign to send out as much love, support, peace, compassion as I can--to whoever needs it. It never hurts to do so. It can only help--if even a little bit--to mitigate the sometimes awful stuff of life on this weird planet.
I send you love. Thanks for being.